I am good, kind and loving.
I am angry ,frustrated and confused.
I am artistic, an empath and I feel emotions.
I am a lover of Nature and despise the abuse of animals.
I am loyal, devoted and true.
I am short tempered, easy to hurt and quick to strike back.
i am a survivor of abuse and I have learned to survive after loss.
I am me. Many things good and equally bad. But I am human so it is as it is.
It is hard to be an Empath/ Discerner and if you are one you know it can be. I have battled so many emotions knowing what I felt was right, holding others pain or hurt and trying to deal with it. The hardest part for me is knowing what is being said or battling toxic people or emotional vampires. I have been called crazy, living in a dark place was said a few times and so many things. I was told I was just trying to cause fights and so much. I thought maybe I WAS crazy. But today changed the playing field for me. I was driving two people somewhere and they got on the subject of honesty. I went into wondering about going crazy because these people kept saying I was because they NEVER said anything about me. The can of worms exploded. I was told to fear not, I am far from crazy and that was cruel what had been done to me. Everything I had thought was repeated to me. Things said about me, the stabbing behind my back, the hate toward me. I should have been upset but I was elated to FINALLY. Have validity that it was true! I am not crazy and the Pit of Vipers had been doing it all along. This was a long write for me but I just had to share !
Turns out I have an Ulcer. And I have to say the pain was so bad that I could not eat much or write or even drink my fave coffee! It is from stress and anxiety. Being an Empath/Discerner at times like these can actually be physically a drain on the body and i have been trying to keep a sunny path away from toxic people but I love and I am loyal so I worry when people are hateful that I am close to or punish me by not speaking. But went to Doc today and got something to hep for today (not pain meds) and start my medicine tomorrow. I hated not being able to write but I hope now I can get back on track. Have a great day/evening. !
Wow. I am trying really hard to be positive but sometimes the stress and anxiety get to me. I am wondering how many others are feeling the overload. Then on top of that, the empath part of me is topped off from the chaos of other minds just bringing in tons of input. I love my Yoga, prayer, meditation and trying to keep it together but sometimes it seems no matter how much I work to be positive is when, bam! I get knocked back a bit. But still hanging in there! Have a great day/evening wherever you are! 🙂