watching Butterflies and I smile….

I went outside to just take a breather and I saw butterflies dancing around my flowers. I had to smile at their beauty and how they just seem happy to me. Just fluttering around and ignoring everything around them. The sound of men building a home across the street. The little dog Lucifer who is barking his fierce words or maybe joy at the World around him. Cats trying to catch them but they fly out of reach. Regardless, they just seem to be creatures that let nothing sway them from their mission. I think I should learn from these awe inspiring creatures.

Grief is like a Current in the River… Ever changing…..

When I lost my children, one at two days, my son Ryan, and my daughter, Nikki in a wreck with three of her friends, I did not realize how much grief can change on a daily basis. It takes a while to get over the shock that numbs you from going insane but it does not stop the pain or tears. I never realized the ups and down and like a flowing river, you have calm places, turbulent areas and dangerous pulls. Grief has been like that to me. I have times I am calm and smile at the memories. Days when I fall apart and just cry. I also have days when anger overcomes it all and I find myself fighting the pain. As time goes on I find more days of calm water but the under current is always there. Waiting.

Spread some Love, Share some Heart………

In all that is going on in this crazy life, I just want to spread some love and and share some love from the heart. I am going to reach out if I can to those who seem sad, or worn down. I want to show those who feel unloved that somebody loves them. One person can change that life. I am going to make that my focus today! Have a great day/evening wherever you are!

Mixing reality into fantasy…. Just some fun downtime….. Part One.

I love fairies as most people know. i love fantasy and I love using design to combine the two. So today is a break from the usual to share some of how I mix reality and fantasy and also some beautiful memories together. I made some of my daughter and her niece who never got to meet . I also brought a bit of love into her sisters photos to keep the sisterly bond. Have a great day/ evening wherever you are and I hope you enjoy.

Getting away from Toxic and spiteful people while still showing compassion…..

I was told during my energy break that someone didn’t understand anxiety, didn’t care and that people should just learn to deal with it. that there was no compassion for them. (I have anxiety) At first I almost went into a spiral and then I realized what differs me from me and them because another said I was too much because I always assume the worst (that was a call where I asked if they were okay because I hadn’t heard from them.) I realized what makes me different is i have compassion. I try to see what they may be going through but that because they are so angry or Narcissistic, they are still humans. Something put us where we are. So I can stand aside and have compassion but also stand strong when being accused of whatever it may be. My Anxiety never stopped me from keeping compassion in my heart and that part of me I love. Have a great day/evening wherever you are.

Sawyer, the Pom rescue is terrified of kittens………..well of life I guess……Lol…..

After losing our Buddy to a heart issue, my daughter found a 9 year old Pomeranian from rescue. I didn’t want another dog but she persisted so I got him and I am glad I did. He is so much like Buddy but a cream color instead of black and white like Buddy. I named him Sawyer. He is so much like sweet Buddy it is almost like having Buddy here. Their personalities are identical. Even when it comes to kittens. We got a kitten for the ten year old child who loves and adores kittens . Sawyer is huge compared to this kitten and Sawyer is small. But he is terrified of this kitten. Of course he is terrified of a lot of things. But this kitten? You would have thought we brought home a baby tiger. So now we have to comfort him and try to assure him that the tiny kitten is not going to teat him to shreds and eat him. He still shudders even though he is finally starting to adjust . Very slowly. Life with dogs and cats. Love it! 🙂

when people try to turn things on you… remember… it is them… not you…

I have found when someone wants to antagonize or start a problem, they will keep on and on to try and get you to argue. Don’t. Let them continue ranting and raving. when they say that you are not”at peace” with things or that you are listening to Satan (one of my favorites) just because you do not agree with them just go on and let them be. These kind of people want a war and I am learning not to give them what they want. As long as I know I am trying to do right and I am a good person then i have learned it is because they want me to feel at odds or to not believe in me. But I do. So i have learned that when that happens, i now turn the channel in my mind to positive thinking and just do not respond to the negativity. 🙂

I am who I am….

Sometimes I am too blunt. I am honest. I fail constantly when trying to get people I know to understand. I have lost children. I love the child I have. I love her babies. I am happy and yet I have anxiety and i often find that being an Empath/ Discerner can be so trying. i do yoga in my home. I try and stay fit but I also have an appetite for sweet things when i do not need them. I am kind and will help anyone in need but I am often used but forgiving. I DO have a sharp tongue with family kids and teens when they are disrespectful. I love to garden and watch and yes, run from Lucifer the Chihuahua terror in the neighborhood. I am so many things but most of all I am me and that is okay by me because I know I strive to be the best I can. Have a great day/evening wherever you are! 🙂