How many of us ever get that? The feeling of someone being in love with you? The feeling of loving you in everyway. It doesn’t matter what you look like or your size or your anything. They are in love with you. The woman or the man. You see the love in their face and feel it in your heart. You long for them when they are not there and you love every moment together. The good and the bad. Trials and pain but you get through it. Together. Blessed are those who have it.
I blogged the other day about finding a part of me again and it has been beautiful. I have also dealt with my mind. Is it the Empath in me or the anxiety telling me this is not okay? That this is not normal for my brain to feel happy. It is so hard but I know for those who live these things, it is very real. I still feel guilt if true happiness tries to climb in since my daughter didn’t get that. Then I feel That surge of the happiness trying to stay and so we battle.
I AM excited. I do not know how or what brought it on or how I found it again except maybe through the music, time with myself, prayer or a dream i had. Maybe a combination of all. But I remembered her and I feel her inside of me. The part that was confident. The honest yet caring person. The happy person who approached life head on. The person who didn’t live with anxiety but hope and belief that it will work out. I lost all of that person somewhere and maybe I didn’t get but a part of her back but it was a part I needed really bad. i am hopeful this will help the current me to get back the part of me that helped me to love, laugh, be happy and survive. I realized that I AM happy of course but I felt guilt with it. I hope finding that old me brings itself to me now.
I have been on an awakening journey the last few weeks and it has been crazy. I have faced my Anxiety demons and sometimes I lost and sometimes I won. I have listened to music, I have prayed. I have done Yoga and I have had times I just meditated but one thing I have realized is how much I have settled for things I didn’t have to. As an Empath I let other’s negativity and hate change me. I hid instead of standing up after getting tired of them beating me down. But I have realized I was the Victim because I allowed it. So, never settle for less than what you deserve. ever.
2020 has been the strangest year I have ever encountered I guess in my life. Viruses, hate, protest, division, monster bugs, new species of every area found, fires, tornadoes, tsunamis, hurricanes, draining of my discernment/empath mind, emotional vampires have been rampant. people losing their minds and the list goes on. Ouch! I have never seen a year like this one before and I have to say it has been so far a Mind Bender.! Wow! But I come here for the calm. The place where I share, care, read other blogs and have my read. So, I think today will be a reading day. I need some of YOUR writings to calm my storm and share in yours. or your anime, laughter, joy and tears. Have a great day/ night!
As you know if you read my blogs, I have anxiety. I do several things as you also know to try and calm it. I do Yoga. Not as often as I should. I breathe slow. I pray. I fight this battle that on some days is great and some days it is easily calmed. why? I don’t know. A great Universal question I guess. But I have started to saying in all ways and especially when I pray, there is nothing I can do about until I learn to conquer it. You take it. Then when it comes, I just keep that mindset. Things are what they are and I will not be able to change them by getting anxious so let it go. Soooo, this is experiment number 2, 9999. We will have to see where it goes. Have a great day/night blogging friends!
Thank you my friend for trying to help me. I am using some of the tools you showed me Raistlin0903. I am trying this now because I am getting so agitated with this. So here goes. Hi everyone. I am just playing around on this to see how these things will work. I am getting some of it! Thank you my sweet friend!
Yes! It is true! Georgia is actually having some Fall Weather for at least a week. I cannot believe it. Cool days and cooler nights. wow. Maybe we can even have a Bonfire! This is awesome. Just wanted to share with you because this is rare indeed. Hopefully, not snow next week or freezing temps.
Seems like everything keeps going haywire right now but we are all having our struggles through these times. I am hanging on to my rope life life crossing these rapid waters. It seems one thing gets clear and another undercurrent comes and tries to pull me under. But on the flip side, I try to stay strong and put on my armor and fight it. And so far, getting through. I still have the ability to laughter at the devil dog across the street. he is back to 100%. I am blessed with a new baby in the family and she keeps everyone in love with her sweet smiles. Life is good just turbulent right now. I hope all of you are staying strong too. If not, get on here with me. We can all hold virtual hands together united. 🙂
I am so glad to have the ability to do Art. I am blessed and happy for that. I am happy to be able to have my Prayer, my Yoga and the different ways to diffuse the chaos that can try and overwhelm my mind. So, I take days off to read your blogs. I take days that I solely fix on Yoga and Prayer and Meditation. This week I am focusing on Painting. it calms me. It soothes me and it keeps my mind of another World I enter when I paint. I hope all of you are have some great things to help release as well! 🙂