I have been reading your stuff, looking at photos and so on. Then it just popped in my head (happens a lot) that even though I have anxiety, why is it called a mental illness? I think it should be an emotional illness. Even though emotions come from the mind, it is still an emotional reaction from our souls I believe and our hearts. I have extreme emotion which at times causes anxiety but it is because I am too loyal, too loving and I think deeply. But my anxiety comes from my heart and soul so I call it an emotional illness not mental. Just me of course in my ranting thought s during reading. Now I am back to reading. lol. 🙂
I am trying to replace negative thoughts and mindset with a positive one. I just an extreme over thinker and I am also an Empath/ Discerner so that can be hard but I am learning slowly to replace those negatives with a positive. So, when I worry about a person or a thing and if, for example, they are mad or upset or if I have done something, I replace it with No, there is nothing I have done and if I have, I apologize but like I used to. I do not worry now for days and every minute. I just replace with the thought that I did what i could so there. When I over worry about what could happen, I stay in the moment and realize I am fine for now. It is a very long process but at least I am giving it my best shot. i am also doing positive imaging. Try to place positive images in my mind. So, that is my place for now!
An introvert, mom, writer, empath, yoga freak, prayer lover, artist, writer, animal activist.
Poet, photographer, a lover of nature, traveling by car to see everything I can, anxiety fighter.
A person who loves too deep, thinks too much, writes because I love it, feels others pains and emotions, struggles with Yoga but I have a love/hate relationship.
A person who believes Life can be good because we have it.
I am just at a drained state of mind. Mentally, I am just at a point where I just cannot even think at times clearly. I have no clue how it came about or what is causing it but it has drained me from writing, art and other things. maybe just the last year has been building up or maybe my mind just needs some serious not over thinking time. Either way, i hope to be more clear headed soon so I can get back to it.
I have been doing a lot of thinking lately and I realized I have spent the last few years often criticized or ‘helped’ by telling me all the things I do or say wrong. It never mattered that I was ready to help anyone who called my ‘honesty’ was too much, my way of saying things was too ‘blunt’ and the list has gone on and on. Today, I realized that no, I just am who I am. Outspoken, loyal, standing up for what I believe in, blunt and at times I am sure, just like everyone prone to have bad moments and days I am just not great to been around. But for once I realize my good outweighs the bad. I may be all the things that were said but my heart is kind and loving. So, take it or leave, I think I like me just the way, I am and who I was designed to be.
Tonight I am sitting by my little dog Buddy and praying he will be okay. It is raining hard outside tonight and the tears are falling as I watch him. He is right at 15 years old. we found out a few months ago he had a part of his heart that is enlarged and causes seizures. he had four today. They said no operating because of his age and that he would not live through it. This little guy was there when my daughter died. he would just sit beside me as I cried so many times and never move. He has been with me at my loneliest. He has been my steady, helpful friend my loyal little Buddy. He has helped me through nights of anxiety or panic so bad that I would hold him crying just to get through. So tonight, I am sitting with him. I am going to be his friend so he isn’t alone as we fight through these seizures. I will be his comfort, I will pet him so he isn’t scared. Tonight my sweet Buddy, I am here for you. As it rains from the sky, so it does from my heart. I love you.
So many times friends or family will try and give advice on anxiety that they do not have and it always turns sour. They mean well I KNOW that. But Anxiety is not something I chose to have. NO ONE would. Your battle is almost constantly a war with your mind. You are given a reprieve occasionally with medication where you do have fear of another attack. I do try it all. Yoga, meditation, prayer, studies, you tube, you name it. But as of now, I have NOT conquered it. I am trying. I wish there were a cure all. I wish you didn’t have to try and understand me. I don’t even understand me. I do not wish this on myself or anyone else. I also just wish so many people did not think that you can just wish it away. I wish I could. My Anxiety thought for the day. Have a great day/night fellow bloggers!
Some days I just find myself in a whirlwind of emotions. I am fighting the every ready Anxiety that tried to bring me down. I feel that fear that comes with asking myself if I am okay or is it just anxiety? I grip onto my mind and tell it to stop. Just stop. Then I pray. I do my Yoga. I put Lavender oil I make behind my ears and on my wrist. Then I start to get calmer and finally I can breathe okay instead of running to my room to get away from everything. I know why I have the anxiety and fear and I know I can beat it but for now I am happy each time I just manage to win the war and not let the fear and anxiety overtake me.
I have no idea why but EVERY full moon and the night before I just cannot get to sleep. I do not even know if this is normal but I know it is agitating! I just wonder if anyone else has this issue? Not a long post but I am just curious because it is so weird!
Well I am not sure if it is all of the praying, yoga, tai-chi, meditation or lack of people. Maybe all of the above but my empath ability is on low gear. I think probably not being around people because the others are for my Anxiety and Panic. But, either way, I am like on a no feel zone with others in ways to gauge what they are feeling. However, it sure has helped me in the anxiety department. Oh well, just thought I would share that!