I Believe…….

I am now trying (I know, always trying something new but hey,lol) the thought system of just trying to believe and really believing each day is going to have something great. Something in the day that captures my attention even if it just a beautiful butterfly. Something that lets me know, hey it is okay and today is good! I know life throws us punches and recently learning more about addicts and addiction, I NEED to see the beauty in things or my anxiety will take over. so that is my new yoga thought or whatever you want to call it so fellow friends and bloggers, I hope you believe today that YOU will find something beautiful in a world sometimes filled with junk. 🙂

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The life of addiction & Panic..

Living with or having a family member who is addicted is really hard. If you have someone you love dating an addict, that is hard as well. It is a hard and long road. It is such a drain in so many ways because you love them but you cannot stop them. You might find yourself enabling them because you are desperate. or you might be trying to get your loved one away from an addict before they turn out just the same. It is too draining when you watch, worry or living with someone and search everywhere to see if there was a stash.
This is just the beginning of a nightmare that never ends until the loved one is dead or finally quits through the grace of God. It takes the lives of the ones loving the addict because the addict can only think of their drugs but the friends and most of all family worry, cry, panic, drive themselves insane and just spend their lives filled with anxiety and there are many who cannot afford the expensive rehabs. It is a sad story for the addict and the ones who love them.

Addiction…… The silent killer…..

Vapes that are addicting teens now, drugs, alcohol, even cigarettes which I am trying really hard to quit. I used to be a “recreational” smoker, quitting during peak times when I was active repelling, hiking, climbing and etc. The slowly, cigarettes crept in and now I am trying to quit. I do not smoke in my car, or in my house or when I have coffee and I never have but I just do not like them anymore so I am trying. I have people I know that I am sadly watching.
They battle alcohol as it destroys their lives, drugs which change them and take over their life and become their God. Teens I see vaping young kids, 13, 14, 15 but I cannot stop them because they are not people I even know or the ones that are well, I have told their parents. It is just sad how addiction to anything can take your life and destroy it. Physically or emotionally or all.
I hate addiction and the ruin it brings.

Life, Love and Happiness……..

Life is beautiful but scary and sad but good.
Love is blind, hard, beautiful and needed.
Happiness is what we make it or how we break it.
I am an emotional roller coaster on this journey and it is crazy.
This world is just an exotic place with so many exotic, unique people
And we are all filled with so many different thoughts, feelings
emotions and words.
Some of us never seem to have a bad day while some of us strive to get
Anxiety, pain, hurt or depression.
Others are always laughing and happy and it seems never bothered by
Anything.
But I think deep down we all experience many of these emotions, we
just live them in a different way.

Panic is doing okay, I am still making fairies and I am blessed and thankful. …

It has been really stressful but I am keeping the panic at bay. I have staying busy and I work on my fairies, exercise, write on my zombie book and do my prayer and meditations! But if I were to say I am not having anxiety at all that would be a lie but at least I am keeping it at a point where I can at most times control it! I am good with that. I have had several days of stress but I keep plugging at it and I am not having to add that extra 1/4 that I cut off but twice. So thanks for all of your support fellow bloggers and friends and I hope your days are doing great as well!

Frustration Day………….

Today has been frustrating! I just need to vent. I am blessed and I appreciate all the beautiful things in my life but I get so agitated when the anxiety level rises and ugh! I have still stuck to my tiny cut back on meds for anxiety but then I deal with the stress. YES I LOVE that I am doing it but when the stress hits it just get so agitating!
I just want to be able to handle this without having to run and take something for anxiety. I am sticking to that tiny cut back but I swear it seems every time I try things go haywire. I know it is just life but omgosh! On the upside, I AM handling it. lol. Sorry. Did not mean to be a downer today but I share the Good, the Bad and the Ugly and the Beautiful and the Happy and the Sad. Thank you for hanging with me when I do!

This thing with anxiety med cut down will be slow. Obviously. :)

I am trying it but I can tell this will be slow going but I figure if I even cut back just a bit it is better than nothing. My experience so far today is letting me know that I have to take this in very slow baby steps but hey! A baby starts by crawling so if I can even manage this of cutting back just a little that is a huge accomplishment to me! So my sweet blogger friends I am trying and I hope it brings encouragement for you too that we can do this in steps or even cut down just a bit!