I am learning each day to accept me for who I am . Not the mold I am supposed to be but the real, actual me. Sometimes I have anxiety. Sometimes I have anger. Sometimes I laugh and sometimes I cry. I post memes because they make me laugh. I write. I create art. My kind of art. Not what is popular or in the “love” type of the year. I am outspoken but loyal and goodhearted. A bit too sensitive at times and easily get my feelings hurt but then I can be tough. I am strange to some people, I do not easily make friends for reasons I do not understand but I accept it. Because, I am. Me.
Such a fine line between the two. What defines the difference?
Insanity is an escape from reality, a journey that some fear to tread.
So is Love.
Love is harsh, yet comforts, gives hope yet causes delusions.
So does Insanity.
Insanity keeps you from accepting certain truths and drives you to the brink.
So does love.
Love demands loyalty. It gives, it takes, it waits fro redemption.
So does insanity.
Most never cross the fine line that divides the two.
For the ones who do, they may never know the difference.
I fight many battles in life as we all do and some I lose and those are bad days and some I win and those are great days. But I gather strength from God, friends, here most of all, yes, it is true, some family but few. Most do care to be there. Just judge. But as I go along, I realize life is full of battles and we just win as many as we can.
Life is also filled with beauty. The people who show love and compassion (some I have never even met), beautiful blue skies, funny animals, children’s laughter, flowers and nature in general. So I am trying to focus on the beauty, not the battles and I hope for those , like me, you can as well! Have a wonderful day everyone!
I do occasionally put some humor on here, lol, but I started blogging for those people like me who need to hear about lives that are not always happy and glorious and for people who live with the loss of a child or anxiety,
panic or live with someone who has these issues. Autism (my oldest daughter) ADHD, OCD (me) and so we could all relate or maybe someone wanted to knw what it is .
But I also love to read the happy blogs and the blogs about photography and just fun things because they lift me up! I love to see the smiles, the flowers, the gardens or old landmarks and just everything. So, of course in an already dismal world, my page is not as popular as others but I never expected it to be.
But that is what I love about the beauty of blogging. We can all be ourselves and share with each other our realities and our lives.
The sweet singing of birds, Children laughing, people smiling.
Butterflies dancing on the flowers, Bees flitting about.
A card or note sent to say I love you, a hug when needed.
ladybugs with their beautiful colors and flowers that color our world.
A baby that smiles for the first time, your child say’s their first word.
Your significant other brings you flowers, you give them the gift they have been wanting and you both smile.
The sound of falling rain, the shaking of thunder.
The world is full of so many beautiful things. We just have to look and take in a breath.
When you laugh at me… others are laughing with me.
When you tell people I am bothering you or I get on your nerves…. I am helping someone else calm their nerves.
When you don’t want people to know we have a relationship….. others are telling me they love me and I love them back.
When you talk about me, complain about how horrible I am… someone else is crying on my shoulder, wishing the someone they love cared about them like I do you.
When you make me cry…. there is someone there who understands my pain and wipes away the tears.
When I only exist in your life behind the public…. Someone is posting our pictures because they were happy I said I would go with them so they didn’t have to be alone.
But when you are alone, the world has deserted you and there is nowhere to turn, I will be there with my arms open to hold as long as I have a breath to take.
I was very down and out last night and feeling a bit discouraged because my life is spent trying to do for others. As humans we NEED to be there for others and likewise. So, I did an experiment. Since I am told so often by people who troll my facebook but do not comment or rarely respond that is is nothing and means nothing, although they are on but hide it so I cannot see it, I wanted to see just how popular it actually was. So I wrote something so out of character that it would take a pretty strange person not to pick up on that something was off key if you know me at all.
I also wanted to see if people just refuse to answer anything they do not like or if they just don’t care. I gauged by writing the post and then seeing how active they were over night. Surprise! Not. They were active all night and a.m. (I trolled myself) and I had two responses. Just two but they were checking all of my other post. The scariest part? It was a post that should have alerted people something was wrong. No I am not suicidal and I DO love my life even among my issues but now I know why people do commit suicide. They reach out but they do not see or feel it in their soul that anyone cares, even if people did. I also discovered social media is VERY active and important to society.