COVID, you suck…. Been off for a bit…

WOW! I have had a LOT of family hit with Covid the last month or so and now another one this week. This is a horrible thing for them and it is scary. Some do great and whip through while others are having a harder time. So I have been focusing on that and I am just too mentally drained to write. This is such a hard situation. You go loco if you try to be cautious and stay away from people and places but then I have seen first hand where going out or just even using every pre-caution you can they still got it. I am ready for this bad boy to hang up its guns and go away!

It started with a temptation to belong…The Battle of Nicotine…

Just try one. It is okay. They help lift you up. they are legal. Not bad at all. That is what started my journey to battle Nicotine. I would do it off and on because many months between everything, I was very Physically active. Rapelling, hiking, climbing, etc. But then I just kept doing it one day. I have never been a normal type smoker. I hate the smell. never do it indoors or in a car or anything like that but now I am on the road again, to stopping. It is the Psychological battle right now, beat the Physical but it can be tough. So, trying hard, lot’s of praying and more exercise than usual. Here I go. lol.

I am so mentally drained…

I am just at a drained state of mind. Mentally, I am just at a point where I just cannot even think at times clearly. I have no clue how it came about or what is causing it but it has drained me from writing, art and other things. maybe just the last year has been building up or maybe my mind just needs some serious not over thinking time. Either way, i hope to be more clear headed soon so I can get back to it.

Things I am learning daily about my Anxiety during this Pandemic…..

I am blessed in many ways. I have to focus on the positive not the negative. I can enjoy some time in the Sun.  Do not allow myself to overthink every. single. thing. Refocus on something that I am blessed with. Do NOT allow other people who knows what triggers my anxiety and uses it to make me anxious. Realize it is not my fault if they are angry or spiteful. Just know that, own the reality of it and go on. Realize that I am probably fine health wise. If not, I am doing my best to get checked but there are some areas where I cannot go and get things that are on hold done. So I am not being careless, I just cannot have it done. Contact people who need comfort or someone to say that I care. Let go of the constant depressing news popping up everywhere and avoid it. There is NOTHING I can do for all of it but stay strong about my beliefs on some of it. Just enjoy the fact that it could always be worse and if it gets worse, do what I can because that is all I can do. That is just a few of the things but I they helping even if just enough to get me through the day! Have a good day/night fellow bloggers!

 

Covid just hit to close to home… It is out there…

A couple of friends just got their test back after mine and both were Positive. I knew it was real. I have been extremely careful but neither knows how they got it. We were not around each other. I was tested because my husband flew to California and with a new baby in the family, we quarantined AGAIN for two weeks and then got tested. So, be safe, be careful do what you have to do but above all know it is real. I read about Covid parties where they are trying to get it to see. Please don’t.

Why so I have trouble sleeping every full moon?…………………..

I have no idea why but EVERY full moon and the night before I just cannot get to sleep. I do not even know if this is normal but I know it is agitating! I just wonder if anyone else has this issue? Not a long post but I am just curious because it is so weird!

Yoga Life………………………….

This is like a guide for me on how to stay healthy, in shape, calm (not always 100% because of anxiety but it sure helps) and how to use it for the things in life that try and take me over the top. There are so many styles and methods and yes, I still struggle because some are just really hard to do. But I do love it and I love being able to lose myself in it. The music playing is calm and sometimes I use the sounds of nature when I am in the mode for that. Yoga. It is a way of life and it does work!

Hello Yoga…. My good friend… Been a while…

I have been so caught up that I put my Yoga on a shelf in my mind where I had occasionally took it off and used it. But now I realize Yoga is a staple that I use to help me to get to quiet moments of tranquility while working me to a point where at times I think I might just fall on the floor. But my Yoga, my longtime friend, pulls me back and helps my mind and my body and my soul. So glad to bring you back.

Anxiety doesn’t make me a Victim OR Weak……..

Today I was told that I am acting like a Victim because I have anxiety and I am weak. NO. Actually, I neither a Victim nor Weak. Quite the opposite. I am a fighter! I fight everyday to battle my mind. I fight everyday to let the joy shine through over a Condition I didn’t ask for. I am NOT a victim or weak if I ask for someone to shoot me a text or call. I think that is just human compassion. I am not a victim or weak because I have a moment where I cannot be there to help this person with what they want at the moment. I just need a bit to get back on track. So, NO! I am NOT what you say just because you are looking for a bag to punch! I am a Survivor and I am a Fighter. So, if someone tells you these remember, it takes a lot to live with condition but we do and we are NOT weak or a VICTIM.

I have tried to be uber positive but I have had like a tough week…. So maybe some downers today… Sorry :(

It has just been tough. Due to immunity issues I am still home bound for now. I have been doing Yoga, Prayer, meditation, essential oils, and just about anything to keep me off this stupid anxiety but it is really hard. Then, as usual, I over think things a 1,000 to a million times. haha. I am doing okay but just honestly, a tough one but I am still counting my blessings as I battle my mind.