As anyone who reads my blogs knows by now I struggle with anxiety, some past abuse and on and on. But I do try. I try to use the gifts I have to make other lives better if I can. I know how it feels to be ignored so I try and pay attention. I know how it feels to be shunned so I try to be kind to someone who is shunned for whatever reason. I am by no means perfect but I have been there and it hurts. The loneliness is painful, the anxiety is scary and the ability to see through people is often depressing. But the good that has come out of it has given one underdog the desire to fight for or be there for the other underdogs in the World. Because I want them all to know that, in reality, we are actually champions if we come out with a good heart that wants to reach out. I have my bad days and times when I am not the best person but to me the key word is, I try. Have a great day/night fellow bloggers! 🙂
Anyone who has this ability knows it can be lonely. I scare my own family sometimes much less try to make friendships but it is a gift that I have learned and I am still learning to control in certain ways. Friends are few or none because they know that I am honest in my perspective and it doesn’t take long for them to realize that I do know, feel and sense their inner shell as opposed to their outer so alas, they kind of fall of the friendship wall. But, I also learned there are times that in our lives, I have to shut up and leave it alone. It just is not worth it. So I avoid the Emotional Vampires the best I can but I also try to help as much as I can until I have to recharge. My thoughts on that for the day. Have a great night/day fellow bloggers!
The picture journeys that speak to my soul, the blogs about life that and love and kids and everything that help me find joy, the blogs about sorrow that help me to know I do not cry alone. The blogs about so many things. Blogs to help us in our writing, blogs about pets, love of Nature, blogs on Yoga, anxiety and empaths. I could go on and on but THANK YOU to each of you who keep me and I know so many other bloggers afloat on our journey of life! You are ALL so very awesome… Off to read more now! Hugs!
Do you feel things that others do not? Do you feel others joy and pain on a deep level? Can you “read” when people are lying and find out later you are right? Do you have the awareness of tuning in when people are being fake and you can discern a fake person right when or not long after meeting them? Do you often find yourself knowing a person is on the prowl? There are so many different areas of this that it would take 50 more blogs to fill it all in. But just wanted to see how many others are like me. 🙂 Hugs!
Too many tears, so many lies, mistrust is never far.
Lost empty fear which divides the heart.
Chains of wisdom and chains of fear bind so many.
As they struggle between trust, love and abandonment.
Trying to conquer the demons within
While looking through rose colored panes.
Sadness, rejection, hopeful, hopeless, blessed, feeling cursed, drained but determined.
Happy yet angry, loved and loving but crazy with despair.
Sun shines, rain falls, bleak hope while searching for that silver lining.
Love, hate, hurt, heal, tortures of the soul.
Broken again, Broken can heal, Broken can be stitched back together
But Broken will always shows the scars of the Journey.
Sometimes I am laughing and I am will be in the middle of staying busy and the tears will come. I do not even know until they fall down my cheeks. I am trying to be positive but the pain just hits and it feels like a physical blow. I wish I could learn to control this anxiety better than I do. I feel so strong the ways an Empath will, that the few I am around when they are at every peak of emotion. I can feel it through calls and sometimes even text. Who even feels emotions through text? And sadly, I am usually am right. Does that me feel empowered? No, it weakens me. So, I just had to say that I AM trying but I am struggling too but yes I know I am blessed and I am thankful for that.
I am learning so much being at home and learning how to try and cope with all of this. I am learning how much I love Prayer, Yoga, meditation, quiet time. I am learning to enjoy the beauty of Nature again. I am learning to take a moment to just be still and feel the sun on my face. To be able to enjoy the things I had taken for granted. I am picking up my camera more, painting again and I am writing. I am trying to quell anxiety but yet take from all of this that I do not have to worry constantly or over think every single little thing. I am best of all learning to live again.