As many of you know, I have issues with Anxiety and being an Empath/ Discerner on top of that can be hard. It has taken a lot of tears, breakdowns, sadness and depression during this past year to really evaluate some things. But I have also become stronger. I have learned, to a degree how to control the feeling of others hurt, wrath, pain and out right attempts to punish me for what I believe in. What I HAVE learned is that the stress brought on an Ulcer and I HAVE to let go of some things. It is a true struggle only Empaths / Discerners can understand as to why it is so hard but I am just throwing positive thoughts into my mind everyday. I am learning to stop listening or to stop reading emails, or texts or anything designed to cause me upset. It is VERY hard but I am learning and that is what matters. Have a great day/evening where ever your are fellow bloggers!
I fell asleep early so of course i was wide awake at 4:30 a.m. Normally I would try and go back to sleep but today I just got up and decided to make the best of it. I am glad I did. I watched from my window as the cats played in the early morning dew. Chasing what I am not sure but it was funny to watch. I got my morning Java and walked outside to hear birds singing, a comfortable coolness in the air and I saw some early flowers that are starting to open. It was a nice way to start the day. Have a great day/evening where ever you may be! 🙂
It is not about the choice of their gender for me. It is about committing a crime and then being allowed to choose which Prison you want. i am sorry but we have been getting soft for too long. When a person commits a crime, they are sent to Prison for punishment so why allow them to choose what prison they want? Do we open a fashion store for them next? This has and is all getting out of hand. IF you choose to commit crimes and go to prison, there should be no allotment for where you go. Just my thoughts.
I have been reading your stuff, looking at photos and so on. Then it just popped in my head (happens a lot) that even though I have anxiety, why is it called a mental illness? I think it should be an emotional illness. Even though emotions come from the mind, it is still an emotional reaction from our souls I believe and our hearts. I have extreme emotion which at times causes anxiety but it is because I am too loyal, too loving and I think deeply. But my anxiety comes from my heart and soul so I call it an emotional illness not mental. Just me of course in my ranting thought s during reading. Now I am back to reading. lol. 🙂
Yes, I called him that. The little Chihuahua across the Subdivision that would stalk with his owner, often jerking loose and chasing us and any thing that moved. Or didn’t, like a pebble that he felt threatened him or his master. He has chased cats, us, leaves, wind and well you get it. He caused such havoc because his tiny self is a little terror. He gave me a break when my sweet little Pom mix Buddy passed almost as if he knew I was grieving and maybe he did. But now, as i see him from my window sometimes and sometimes from the safety of my front door nearby (should I need to jump back inside) I have learned to just laugh at him. He is a tiny thing but he has no fear. Of ANYTHING or anyone. Maybe I could learn a thing or two from this little creature who thinks he is a Dragon. Actually, maybe I have. 🙂
Needless to say, we all know 2020 and now 2021 has proven to be, well, strange, sad and confusing. The many things that I try to work on such as Anxiety, stress, grief and the loss of loved ones took its toll. So, I had to have something to help. That is when I let my love for art and writing kick in. I had to have something. I found new creative ideas and I am glad because it kept me from going insane. Now, I just draw or paint whatever comes to mind. One plus in the last season of weird. 🙂
I see your picture every morning. I think about you everyday. You made me smile and I know you still watch over me. But I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss our chaotic, happy, silly life we shared. You brought us so much laughter and joy. I wish you were here to see the beauty that came after. your sister growing up to get married and have her beautiful babies. If you could be here to see how I paint and how it changed. How so many things we could be doing together or the talks we would be having. But even though you left me a long time ago, I love the time I was blessed with you. For that, I get to love those memories so when I do wish you could be here, I can still go back to the time when you were here and even when I cry, I also smile. Because if you had never been here, I would not have learned so many things that carry me through now. I love you always. Love, mom
So much has changed in this new “normal”. Locked in, facetime for family and friends, mask, anxiety, Fear, sickness, tears, a longing to be with those you love, a desire to be in that church you always assumed would be open. The Yoga classes, the gym and the work place where it was always such a chore. the schools where our children met, learned and played. This new “normal” has sucked in so many ways. But there have been blessings too. Learning to appreciate what we took for granted. The freedom to see who we wanted when we wanted, the ones who loved being alone then found that having the opportunity to get out taken away made some of us want to reach out. It has made me have such an appreciation for things I just never worried about. I never knew wearing a mask could be so weird but I know how those with cancer must have felt or feel. The blessings have been seeing just how much we will now absorb and breathe in the ability to be able to be free again. So, along with the chaos cam the blessing of learning again how precious life can be.
I am trying to replace negative thoughts and mindset with a positive one. I just an extreme over thinker and I am also an Empath/ Discerner so that can be hard but I am learning slowly to replace those negatives with a positive. So, when I worry about a person or a thing and if, for example, they are mad or upset or if I have done something, I replace it with No, there is nothing I have done and if I have, I apologize but like I used to. I do not worry now for days and every minute. I just replace with the thought that I did what i could so there. When I over worry about what could happen, I stay in the moment and realize I am fine for now. It is a very long process but at least I am giving it my best shot. i am also doing positive imaging. Try to place positive images in my mind. So, that is my place for now!
In Georgia we get so many seasons rolled into one week until Summer. Each week, (unless it is Summertime when we have pretty much nothing but hot, sweltering, skin drenched days of heat, ) we get just such a variety of Weather. Like one day it is 65 to 70 and Sunny, the next day we have monsoon rain and flooding to be followed by a possible choice (not ours of course) of either really warm and breezy or not breezy, or Icelandic temps with gushing and biting wind that can give you frostbite. Of course no snow with any of that or rarely anyway. If we have rumors of snow, then yes, it is true. we get people buying all of the milk and bread up. Mix into that, during this spell of temps., you can sometimes fit in a Summer day with hot temps. Then Summer comes. Just hot, hotter and hottest. So, there is our yearly forecast for sweet Peach and pumpkin filled Ga. I might add, I do love it here. Just not the weird climate. lol.