Is it OCD? Just me? Just the way I am wired? I overthink everything. I will overthink whether it is my writing or my art or people or animals and well you name I overthink it. I try and just keep in it my mind, let it go. It is what it is but then I started overthinking that so I decided maybe I should accept who I am and go on. Yep. Over think about that too. But I am trying to do brain games and stimulate my mind to just get it focused. Focused off of thinking and worrying about things I KNOW are useless. So, My post thought for the day! 🙂
The life of an Empath, or discerner, or old soul or whatever you choose to refer to yourself as is not an easy one at all. It is to me a very beautiful but hard journey because you can figure out your real friends and those will probably be on two fingers if that and you can spot fake people of which there are many. I do not mean there are no good or loyal people but in a world of plastic emotions, you just have to find them.
So often, I am feel alone because of the ability to see through the lies, deceit and the fronts people put up BUT on the up side, where as I used to be full of doom and gloom over the sadness of wanting “real” friendships, I have learned to laugh (most of the time) and I have learned many people do not even realize they are doing it. The world has taught us to be happy, friends with everyone, do not offend and just be whatever that person with you at the time wants you to be.
However, again, I do not apply this too everyone. There are so many really genuine nice people out here in this big world but I just have to search them out. Yes, I have good people around me as well. But now I just smile and laugh because I tried being honest about how I felt and I thought I was going to be kicked off the planet for verbalizing. So. I learned the best way is just smile or breakdown and I am choosing(this week anyway) to smile. 🙂
So, my daughter is having her second child and what a walk in the park. I feel empowered because now SHE needs me. hahahaha. My sweet precious daughter wants me to keep said baby coming at least one day a week after she goes back to work. I am elated, no mistake about it but wow what a change. Now it is I could never trust anyone but you and I do not want her in daycare (understood, neither do I) but if you read about the first grandchild you can see why I find it a bit amusing. With the first, you would have thought I had not given birth to my OWN child. hahahahaha. Anyway, of course I said I would but I am just a bit amused at the change and the difference of how now I am suddenly the best thing to ever happen to a body. All joking aside, I am glad she has realized I am capable of holding and keeping a baby and I am happy she realizes she trusted me all along but child number one was just like all of us first time moms. Just wanted to share a bit of when your kids have kids humor.
Do we all have a bit of a demon with us or is it just a side to us that we show no one but that exist? Maybe it is just us or just me. The part of me that makes me so aggressive or defensive. the part of me that makes me want to punish those who treat me wrong or to make them pay for the way they treat me. I know I can be short tempered and I cannot and I repeat cannot stand disloyal people. I cannot stand back stabbers. I have a very low tolerance for fake people or any of that. But I also have that sweet angel within. The one who shares anything I have, down to my clothes, food, money, you name it. I care, I am loyal and I am a sucker for the under dog. Sooo, I was just curious about your thoughts on these things. have a great one my friends!
Love can be one of the most beautiful things in the world.
It is so much a part of us and we want to hold it close.
It embraces us, holds us, makes us smile.
It challenges us and it forms us and it molds us.
Who we are, what we are, how we react.
But when love breaks or was never there
It can destroy us and tear us apart.
It can make us feel like we are a sinking ship
Falling prey to the massive waves of sorrow.
It can start in childhood or it can happen when we are young or even when we are old.
Such a powerful emotion. With the ability to hold us together or tear us apart.
Life is like a jungle. There are predators everywhere in every shape, form and mindset. There are beautiful species that try and make your world a rainbow of love and colors and there are the most dangerous predators. The ones who feed on your soul. They are the most dangerous because they are disguised often as so beautiful, alluring and mystic. Like the mermaids of the sea though, they will kill your soul. They are always you r best friend and there for you while all along they are masked. Using that to deceive you and take what they can get so beware! It’s a jungle out there and we need to be aware! lol. Have a beautiful one my friends. Just be careful.
UGH! I am doing better this week with trying to maintain positive thinking and not allow my anxiety by over thinking EVERYTHING to bother me but this is so annoying sometimes. like seriously? It can go great for so long and then BAM. Therapist, meds, Yoga, Tai Chi, meditation, prayer, you name it and I do it. But it is the BOOM days that annoy me. Like it comes out of nowhere even if I have had a good day. Oh well, I guess I am very blessed those days that are very good and bummed at the days that are so bad. Yee haa. lol. Have a great day/night fellow bloggers/writers. 🙂